BUMFODDER


bumfodder: toilet paper
I love conservation of syllables.
Bum𐫴fod𐫴der has one less syllable than toi𐫴let𐫴pa𐫴per.
The implication is obvious. Toilet paper must be replaced with bumfodder in all possible instances. (If you're really hardcore on this issue, there's another option with just two vowels: loo roll.)
But whatever you call it, whatever brand you prefer, or whatever method of use you subscribe to... This stuff is one of the greatest inventions in modern history. If you don't agree, think about the barbaric, unbelievable stuff people used to wipe their bums clean before TP existed.
However, there is an even bigger issue at hand than its name or its cultural significance. Those things are practically irrelevant compared to
which way it's oriented it on the roller.
Should the paper hang down below the roll from behind? Or should it roll over the top?
If you're not familiar with this debate, let me assure you: it matters. You would not believe how much it matters.
What's not clear is why. There are varying theories, but no clear-cut consensus on why people feel so strongly about this.
Do you know why it matters?